5. a farewell to spooky szn
you'll be missed
I’ve hit the threshold of saying spooky szn so many times my friends will disown me (hi), but now that it’s over I’m taking the opportunity to scream it one last time. Every October I make an attempt at prolonging the arrival of seasonal depression with all of the fall shit I can think of, to the point that I’m drowning in pumpkin spice by November.
So here’s a compilation of spooky szn books and shit that I read this October, and it’s so long that I expect no one to read this but I’ll thank you for just opening the email.
books
There are so many spooky/weird/aesthetically cute but not scary/whatever books out there that this year, I’ve gotten overwhelmed and have been frozen in fear, meaning I didn’t read most of the ones on my list. But here’s what I did get to:
The Death of Jane Lawrence by Caitlin Starling — a strange and wild ride! Had I, a fantasy skeptic, known that this book switches to fantasy halfway through, I wouldn’t have picked it up. And while that genre change did knock a few points off for me because I don’t like surprises, I was still entertained. And that’s really all I ask for. Jane Lawrence, our independent gothic protagonist extraordinaire, arranges her own marriage to the town’s lone-wolf mega-hottie doctor because she thinks that marriage is the way to liberation (I mean, sure, Jane). Dr. Lawrence, however, is a lone wolf for a reason that anyone who’s read a gothic horror novel already knows: our man has secrets in his creepy ass mansion!
The first half of this book is pretty standard, as far as gothic novels go. Jane decides to go fall for Dr. Lawrence and stick her nose in his business instead of running away and saving herself, because love 💕✨, but it’s after she starts uncovering the secrets that things take a turn toward fantasy. I don’t think it’s a spoiler (also like five people read this newsletter) to say that the secrets all revolve around magic. The second half of the book started dragging for me because the magic really slowed the action down, probably because there are entire pages just detailing the steps of magic rituals and spells. I honestly think you can flip past a couple of these and still follow the story, but anyone more into fantasy probably wouldn’t want to. I just lack an imagination.
Smoke Gets in Your Eyes: by Caitlin Doughty — This is a memoir and technically not a spooky szn book, but seeing as it’s really just about death, it qualifies by my loose standards. I haven’t read a memoir that’s made me think so much in a long time, and I would recommend it to anyone who is open to having their notions about death and dying challenged (and I think you should be). Maybe you’re already pretty open-minded about this, but humans’ relationship with death is perhaps the most complicated one we have. The rituals we in the U.S. engage in to distance ourselves from the inevitable — the one definite truth in our existences — are fascinating when you look at them as arbitrary choice instead of human nature. And if you come away from this thinking you still want to be embalmed when you die, please talk to me and explain yourself.
My one complaint is that this felt a little insensitive at times, though I couldn’t tell if that was just me or not. Some of the slang and accented English used in the dialogue with BIPOC “characters” felt unnecessary, especially considering this is a memoir and all of these conversations are reconstructed from memory and it didn’t feel like it was adding much. There are also some borderline fatphobic jokes made under the pretense of scientific facts; maybe they’re facts, but that doesn’t mean they can’t be presented in a way that isn’t poking fun at fat people. And while I think it’s healthy to look at death more objectively, the manner of death does matter. I cringed at a few descriptions of suicide or drug use and the stereotypes of who those people were when they were alive. To that extent, I think there could have been more of an emphasis on grieving, since that’s essentially what keeps us from looking at death objectively and rationally.
I haven’t seen much in the way of my complaints, honestly, so it’s probably safe to say I’m just being sensitive, maybe even proving Doughty’s point that we shouldn’t be so sensitive, but idk — bodies might just be bodies, but they’re people before that.
Payback’s a Witch by Lana Harper — I proclaimed myself a fantasy skeptic a mere moment ago, so I’m contradicting myself by saying that the fantasy element of this book was the best part. It could have stood on its own without the romance, or at least with less of a focus on it. The author sets her scenes carefully and relies heavily on sensory imagery, and if I’ve ever wanted to throw myself into a book before, it’s this one. Thistle Grove sounds pretty perfect. I thoroughly enjoyed the story of the dueling magical families, the friendships, and the Gauntlet competition drama, but that was all so strong that the relationship ended up falling a little flat for me, as great as it is to see bi representation.
Also, I hate those “X meets X” comparisons because they almost always oversell a book, but I can’t get it out of my head that this is like John Tucker Must Die meets The Goblet of Fire. And since a certain TERF has taken the latter from us, I very much appreciated those vibes.
Anyway, overall I gave this one a solid 4 stars and am very happy to hear that there’s going to be a whole Thistle Grove multiverse type of series, with the second coming next year.
Reprieve by James Han Mattson — This was supposed to be my other truly spooky book of the month, but then it went and blew me away because it’s very much more than that. In fact, I wouldn’t classify this as a thriller or horror at all; it’s fiction with a horror element just by the nature of the central conflict: a 1990s full-contact horror house experience (this is a good Wikipedia/internet hole to fall down if you’re in the market because these are somehow real). It follows characters before, during, and after their experience at the house goes very awry, so you’re clued in on the crime from the beginning. The story does jump around a bit as it alternates timelines and characters throughout, but I didn’t find it hard to follow because I was so invested.
On Goodreads, I saw a lot of reviews that seemed disappointed because it wasn’t a thriller or horror novel. I honestly think this is just bad PR on the publishing company’s part because it doesn’t seem like it was marketed toward the right audience. Instead, it was aimed at thriller/horror fans, and they’re not wrong that it doesn’t deliver on that promise. It’s not particularly suspenseful or gory, and you’ll guess the twist (which is more like a gentle spin) easily.
But none of those things disappointed me because I thought it worked so well from a literary standpoint. The writing is great, the broader themes are great, a lot is just great. The characters are often insufferable and frustrating, and yet the author is still able to invoke sympathy for them. I don’t think this book could have worked with heroes; the characters needed to be deeply flawed. And for a book that does have a little gore, this was incredibly nuanced on themes of race, toxic masculinity, and the naive stupidity of being young.
Also, there was a surprise appearance of D.C. scenery, and it is always delightful to read a book with a D.C. setting that isn’t some Scandal-esque political novel. The majority of the book takes place in Lincoln, Nebraska, but it was fun to have a shoutout here and there.
Anyway, I gave this book five stars. I really loved it.
The Ex Hex by Erin Sterling — I didn’t actually read this book in October because I had an e-ARC from Netgalley and read it early. It’s another witchy, Halloween-themed romance (those words sound ridiculous together), so it’s certainly not spooky, but it still fits the seasonal vibes.
I’ve gone back and forth on whether I liked The Ex Hex or Payback’s a Witch better. I think the latter was better written with better world building, but The Ex Hex stands out for its humor and Halloweentown feels. I think what bothered me was that the author said it was like “Hocus Pocus but they fuck” — catchy, but like, completely inaccurate. The romance is more prominent, which means the plot isn’t as strong, but that means it’s probably a better escape. I really wish it were a movie and think that the idea of a town that has had its magic go haywire would almost be better in that format because it allows for more hijinks.
drinks
We made one ridiculous October-y drink this month, and it was pretty decent so here’s the recipe for anyone not ready to let pumpkin go!
2 tbps. pumpkin puree
1.5 oz bourbon (this was a shot and a half for me, I’m just assuming 1.5 oz)
1-2 tbsp. of maple syrup (depending on how sweet you like your drinks)
coffee bitters
orange bitters (orange liqueur would prob be better but whatever you have)
dash of cinnamon or other spices like nutmeg
you’ll want to shake well with ice and double strain with a fine-mesh strainer, because who doesn’t want to work for their alcohol?! (me, I don’t want to work for it)
etc.
Lithub decided to give some currently popular novels Goosebumps titles in honor of the season. Who read and loved The Curse of the Friend With a Book Deal by Sally Rooney?!
Finally, we’ve been blessed with the winners of the annual Jezebel scary stories. But there’s more! You can also read all the submissions in the comments, I guess if you need to pull an all-nighter.
well, tune in for the next edition of whenever I remember this substack exists and want to be annoying, and good luck with your seasonal depression until then.
